no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Randomize
