I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
All the doctor said was why
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
Randomize
