No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
Randomize
