so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
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