Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
Do you know how when animals have surgery they put those cones around their heads so they can't lick their wounds so they can heal? I think someone should invent that for human emotions.
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
