Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
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