69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
Randomize
