shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
Accidentally peeing a little on the couch in the middle of a sneeze is way different from railing a random on our waffle counter. I am the better roommate.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
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