real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
Randomize
