No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Randomize
