did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize