thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
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