the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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