Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
Randomize
