HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
Randomize
