he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
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