worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
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