I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
Randomize
