Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
Randomize
