just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
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