I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
Randomize
