Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize