What a fucking waste of an outfit
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
I wrote myself a note last night telling me to tell you that you're the best person ever, and asking you not to tell me what I did, I think I'm trusting my drunk judgment on that one.
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
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