Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
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