i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
Text me right after you finish, I want to know how the ghetto fleshlight worked out
How about I just call you while I'm doing it so you can hear my reaction?
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
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