You really coming over, don't trick.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
I made friends with the delivery guy because he had beautiful dread locks and was a Zelda fan. He texted me after he left saying he wasn't trying to be creepy but we should be friends. We're hanging out tomorrow.
How does this kind of shit happen to you?!
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
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