He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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