No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
Randomize
