Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize
