He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
i believe in u and ur pee
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
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