all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
Randomize
