On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
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