So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
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