oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
So I've decided that when I turn 50 and have to have a colonoscopy I'm going to leave a surprise for the doctor to find.
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
Randomize
