Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
By the way can you translate "sorry, she played you bruh" to Spanish? Some Hispanic guy who spoke absolutely no English callled me last night and when I tried to tell him he had the wrong number the response was "como? No no no no...." And then click. He was gone
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
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