you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
