So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
Randomize
