I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize