marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
Randomize
