I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
You peed on a flamingo?!?
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