Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
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