put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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