Don't you send me to vm
$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
