Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
