Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
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