shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
Randomize
