I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
You have to summon your inner elephant
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Randomize