Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
Randomize