The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
