I haven't been this sober since birth.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
Randomize
