The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
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